Copyright © 1998 Jeff Unsworth

Faythers Day Eawt

" Eeh , owd cock, tha looks smart in yon jackit.
Them britches thi fit thi reet weel.
Just wait till tha's geet thi new cap on,
That collar, eaw does it feel ?"

Come here, al tuck thi shart lap in.
Un them draws tha's geet on , are they clen ?
Un dust know that thi flies on thi pants are undone 
But tha'l at butt'n them up thi sen.

I ope tha's purr a clen vest on.
Un on thi shart tail there's nowt breawn.
Cos I don't want thi shamin mi dee'uth.
Cos remember, tha could get knocked deawn.

Neaw fass'un thi waistcoat top butt'n.
Al get thi a snotrag thats clee'un.
Un heres thi pipe un thi bacc'ow
Un theers thi specs un gowd chee'un.

They'l be waitin eawtside ert King Billy.
Hurry up Joe, tha'l at fot be doin.
If tha not theer on time, they'l go beawt thi.
So pick up thi brass un get goo'in.

Neaw when yo get seawthpoo'ut, tak notice.
Weer charabang driver is parkin.
Un mek sure tha theer in plenty of time.
Else they'l leave thi, thal find thi sell warkin.

Neaw I know that yo'l av plenty ale.
Un last yer tha could'nt stond up.
Un tuthers thi at fotch thi wom.
On aceawnt of awt thale that thad supped.

Un when tha gets wom ,Thee be quiet.
I don't want thi mek'in a peep.
Un don't thee bi wack'nin childer.
If their wack'nt ast not gerr um sleep.

Neaw , when tha gets up in't morn mornin.
Gut lavvy afoor tha comes up.
Cos I don't want thi pee'in in't wardrobe.
Like tha's done when tha's ad too much sup.

So, get gone un av a good time.
I know that tha will, there's no deawt.
But mek sure owd lad, tha looks after thi sel.
Un I ope tha enjoys thi day eawt.

Fathers Day Out (Translation)

Old man, you look smart in that jacket.
Those trousers, they fit you very well ( weel )
Just wait till youve got your new hat on.
That new collar, how does it feel.


Come here , I'll tuck your shirt tail in.
Those underpants youve got on , are they clean. (clen )
And do you know that the flies on your pants are undone.
But you'll have to button those up your self. ( sen )


I hope that youve put a clean vest on.
And on your shirt tail there's nothing brown.
For Idon't want you shaming me to death.
For remember you could get knocked down.


Now fasten your waistcoat top button.
I'll get you a hankie thats clean.
And here's your pipe and your tobacco.
And there is your specs and gold chain.


They 'll be waiting outside the King Billy.
Hurry up joe you'll have to be doing.
If your not there on time, they'll go without you.
So pick up your money and get going.


Now when you get to southport, take notice.
Where the coach driver is parking.
And make sure that your there in plenty of time.
Or they'll leave you , you'll find yourself walking.

Now i know that you'll have plenty ale.
And last year you could'nt stand up.
The others they had to bring you home.
On account of the ale that you'd supped.


Now when you get home, you be quiet.
I don't want you making a peep.
And don't you be wakening the children.
If they're awakened i won't get them to sleep.


And when you get back in the morning.
Go to the toilet before you come up.
And Idon't want you peeing in the wardrobe.
Like you've done when you've had to much to sup.


So get gone and have a good time.
I know that you will, there's no doubt.
But make sure old lad you look after yourself.
And I hope you enjoy the day out.

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